Substituting Severely Handicap part 2

I got to go to the same school again! Same teacher, same school, different day. I actually got 5 1/2 hours of sleep this time! Oh yummm. Better than 2 hours. Believe you/me.

My day began when I woke up. I fired up the coffee machine and had some coffee with my breakfast. I bought some weird organic milk yesterday that contained 2% creme. I poured it into the cup and chunks came out, like it was curdled. It looked disgusting, like there was creme cheese coming out.

I didn't have chocolate or coffee flavors to make my especially delicious coffee treat. I wanted to buy some but only my cousin knows of this secret store that has really inexpensive coffee products. I've tried to find the store before, but ended up going in circles downtown and accidentally ran a red light. Luckily the cop was too busy to pull me over. Yes, true story.

Anyway, I left earlier to drive to oakdale, but I was as late as I was yesterday. I didn't really talk to the aides today. They were in a crabby mood and I wanted lobster.

I got about 100 high fives from the students today. When they drank a cup of water, when they threw the ball to me, when I smiled, when they smiled......etc etc.

Everything was a great accomplishment for them and needed a high five from me. I appreciate that they didn't slobber on their hands first, which happened to me when I was subbing for autism children.

The teacher aides taught them well. For some reason I always hear special ed aides yell out this weird random comment saying "Hey! Nice hands!"

The comment makes no sense. It's said with anger. Give me nice hands!!! They say it's not yelling, it's their "mommy" voice. If it was my mom's voice growing up, I wouldn't have liked my mommy. My mommy was never a meanie. Unfortunately, it delayed my maturity.

One of the blind children + mentally handicap was excruciatingly funny. He would repeat what you said, but also answered yes and no and some other simple questions.
What was even funnier is that he would say it enthusiastically and raise his voice, just right, so it would sound like he was mocking you.

"Would you like some water?"
Yessssssssss.

"Warm or cold?"
Warm please!

"I saw your mom"
....I saw your mom!

Do your work
...Do your work!

The funniest one was when we were talking about him going to the nurse. We asked what room he stayed in.
"room 1."

Did you like the nurse?
yessssssss

Did you drive her nuts?
yessssssss

Then when we were getting ready to go out side he would keep saying "Are we going outside?"

When we finally reached outside, he would still ask. "Are we going outside?"......lol
Yes! You're outside!

"You're outsiiiiiiiide!!"

I then met a little girl outside that was also S.H. She wanted to play ball with me. They don't look where they're going to throw and they don't warn you when they're going to throw. At one point I saw this ball fly at my head, but I was able to stop it, because I'm skilled.

Well this girl did warn me and she even had a count to when she was going to throw. She said.......1.........2.........3...........4............5........6.......7.....!
Yes! She broke the counting rules. You're supposed to throw it on 3, but she kept counting! I was like......ok when is she going to throw it? I think she stopped at 11. I was tricked by a severely handicapped. I upgraded her problem to critically handicapped.

She then threw the ball and when I caught it, she said that I won a trophy. Oh joy! Then she threw it at my knees and said "the boy lost!, ha ha ha!"

Boyzzz areeeee dumbbbbb, you're a loser!!!! Loserrrrr loserrrrr loserrrr.
My aide jumped in and said "Ok that's enough..."

LOZZERR

Oh really? I grabbed her and put her on the wall and said you lost. You lost your recess.

NO!

Yep

She ran away. She was very funny and I got really child envy. I almost proposed to the aide. She reminded me of my ex though. Mean, tall and with a southern accent.

I went to lunch finally and it was very nice. I figured out why lunch is so great. You don't have to work, obviously, but!, time still elapses. See....it would be something nice already if time stopped and you took a break, but time still goes on, so what seems like a 6 hour job is only 5. Beautiful...beautiful....beautiful....

I got to visit my grandma. Who gets to do that at their job? She gave me coffee and I got to sit on the couch. She felt bad she didn't have any cookies for me. It was really satisfying. She made me promise to bring a girlfriend to thanksgiving, so I'll put up an application up for that asap.....

We're supposed to go to lunch tomorrow, but I don't work there again. How sad. I was going to get free mexican food. Burrritooooooooooooo! =(